


To: Skai Prisa   From, Heda

by Anonymous



Category: The 100 (TV), The 100 Series - Kass Morgan
Genre: Angst, Bottom Lexa, Clexa, F/F, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Maybe some smut later, Stubborn Clarke, clexa angst, clexa fluff, simp clarke, simp lexa
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-29
Updated: 2021-01-02
Packaged: 2021-03-10 21:08:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,879
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28413657
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: After the season 2 finale. Doesn't (for the most part) follow the season 3 plotline and no main character deaths. Stubborn Clarke, almost dying and simp Lexa trying to take care of her.
Relationships: Abby Griffin/Marcus Kane, Anya/Raven Reyes, Clarke Griffin & Lexa, Clarke Griffin/Lexa, Octavia Blake/Lincoln
Comments: 28
Kudos: 62
Collections: Clexa





	1. What was I supposed to do?

Author's Note: This chapter was written to my playlist of Clexa favorites, mainly from the seasons 1-3 soundtrack, and might be cool to read along to it. I'm a little scared to start writing but here we are and I promise I'll do my best. Please, please leave comments and suggestions- ideas, if you want more oneshots or turn this into a multichapter, etc.

TW: This chapter talks about an infected wound in mild detail and being underweight and malnourished in terms of not having enough food in the wild. If these subjects may trigger you, you might want to avoid this chapter or the sections of detail. If anyone actually reads this and has triggers, comment them below so I can mark them throughout the book!

Clarke could hear twigs snapping under her bare feet as she faltered through the forest- she had sliced the bottom of her foot open on a particularly sharp rock a day earlier, and although she had done her best to bandage it, she could feel the dull throbbing of the wound. She needed to find some shoes; the ones she brought down from the Ark were made with as little material as possible and only made for the flat, bare and cold floors there, and tore apart easily on her first day on her own in the forest. She had kept track of how long it had been for a while, but she eventually gave up. The last day she kept track was day 18. She needed time away from everyone to clear her head. At least, that's what she told herself. In truth, she just couldn't bear facing her people every day after what she did at the mountain. She killed innocent people, children. Children. She shook her head and proceeded to walk towards a deer she was attempting to shoot with a flimsy bow she had carved with a sharp river rock after she realized she couldn't bring herself to even pick up a loaded gun. She stepped back to aim and felt her foot break yet another branch, and after an echoing crack, the deer dashed away into the woods.

She groaned in frustration and her stomach grumbled in agreement. She hadn't eaten anything but berries and nuts growing on the bushes around her in what seemed like at least a week- and even before then what little meat she was able to catch was rationed between days. She whirled around to go back to the makeshift home in a small cave next to a river she was residing in, and she felt her shirt catch on a sharp branch next to her and could hear the quick rip of the thin material as the shirt all but tore in half. "Shit!" she exclaimed in rage, and fumbled with the piece until it came away from the branch and could see how much damage had been done. Her only clothing had already been tattered and dirty, but now the only thing left on her top besides the pieces clinging together by strands was her bra. She felt exposed, like the layers of fabric she had would protect her from reality. The cold of winter was starting to creep in and bite, making this a very inopportune time to lose her only protection from potentially catching hypothermia. She had never personally seen a case, considering most of her medical experience stemmed from the Ark, which was consistently climate-controlled, but she knew it was something to be extremely wary of.

As she trudged back to her camp, she pondered when she would be able to find sustaining food. Soon, she knew snow would start to fall from the sky and bury nearly everything in sight, making the ground impenetrable and traveling immensely difficult. She perhaps had a couple weeks or so, but she didn't know. All she had on this topic previously was some books about Earth she read on the Ark, and a couple days' worth of slush on the ground when she visited TonDC. She never had to survive in it- the area around the dropship and Arkadia was warmer by the time they were on Earth and she always had the remnants of the Ark to shelter her. Clarke had considered moving camp to the dropship, but if she knew her mom there were going to be search parties out looking for her around camp, and she wasn't ready to face her people. Not yet.

As she reached the familiar sight of the cave that housed her few belongings, she breathed a sigh of relief. Her legs were tired and sore from walking and her foot thudded with pain- she needed to re-bandage it. First, she grabbed the makeshift cup that someone had figured out how to make from weaving leaves together and hobbled to the nearby river to quench her thirst. She knew she was incredibly dehydrated, she hadn't had anything to eat or drink since dawn when she had set out on her journey for food. As soon as she finished drinking the water and had staggered back to her cave, she collapsed on the pad of leaves she used as a bed and lifted her foot up to inspect it. It was swollen and pink, and by touching her fingertip to the surface around it and feeling the heat radiating around it she could tell it was infected, and unless she got treatment within it would soon become nearly impossible to walk on it, therefore making it impossible to scavenge for rations and collect water. Fuck. This just made her situation even worse.

Dusk was setting in and so was the cold and she was acutely aware of the nip of wind against her bare skin no longer protected fully by her shirt, and she quickly set to work making a fire. She had struggled with this task as soon as she set out alone, but remembered her Earth skills class she attempted to find 2 somewhat dry sticks on the ground and started rubbing them together. Now, she was somewhat adept at this skill. However, as soon as she started getting smoke rising from the sticks, rain started pouring down from the sky and the howling wind drove it directly into the cave and destroyed her efforts and any hopes of warmth over the night. Unless the rain stopped in the next couple of minutes while she ate, she was going to have to go to sleep without a fire for the night. Luckily, she managed to grab a blanket before she left Arkadia, which would keep her slightly warmer as she slept.

She took off the backpack she carried around and took out a handful of berries and nuts. As she started slowly eating them, she contemplated that she didn't have many left, maybe enough for a day and a half before running out. 2 days, if she really cut down her intake to the bare minimum. Her weight had already substantially dropped, she could tell that without a scale. Her ribs were near showing and you could see she wasn't healthy. If hypothermia set in, she would be gone within hours. After she finished the last berry, she laid down on the thin pad of leaves and pulled the thin, scratchy blanket over her. She could feel herself shivering and she pulled her knees to her chest to preserve heat and paced her breathing. She felt the wind blustering against her back and shut her eyes tighter and did her best to block out all feeling and fall asleep.

Her mom, being drilled into for bone marrow. Screaming, crying for anyone, someone to come help. The cold of the lever in her hand as she pulled it. Stepping over hundreds of writhing, burning bodies. Jasper, sobbing over a dead, mangled Maya. Saying it was all her fault. Bodies slumped over a dinner table. Kids, dead over a soccer ball that was passing between them moments earlier. Screaming, crying. Feeling wetness on her cheeks. Realizing it's her screaming and crying. Doubling over in pain as she sees more people dying everywhere. Octavia, raven, her mom, dying over radiation. Shaking. Collapsing into someone's arms. Holding her, stroking her hair. Gasping for air...

"Clarke. Clarke. CLARKE." She had hoped she would never hear that voice again. And that's what tore her out of her nightmare. She tried to move her arms, but they were bound down. She then realized she was shaking violently, tears still streaming down her cheeks. "Breathe with me. In... 1... 2... 3... Out... 1... 2... 3... 4..." Subconsciously, her breathing pattern shifted from erratic and irregular strenuous breaths to a long, yet still shaking rhythm. Her body stopped shaking and she could sense the restraints on her arms slip away. She opened her eyes slowly, to a pair of emerald green eyes that could only belong to one person.

Author's Note: please leave feedback/votes/comments!! where do you want the story to go? what did I do right/wrong? should I leave this as a oneshot or multi-chapter? Thank you if you do and thank you to my readers!


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll try and do an update every day/every other day because I know they're pretty short. 
> 
> TW: Mild descriptions of violence and injuries. Refusal to eat out of anger.

Clarke jolted upwards, if not in panic, then in rage. She had hoped the voice was a hallucination of some sort. Another part of her dream, perhaps. She watched the always stoic face of Lexa- The Commander- she mentally corrected herself, break for a split second into what looked like relief. Her head was pounding, and she knew her eyes must be playing tricks on her. Her eyes closed once more to clear her mind, she shook her head and opened her eyes. Nope. Still there. She wanted to move, hurt her. But at the moment, she was too confused and above all, weak to do anything.

Tears burned at the edge of her vision as she welled up at the feeling of being comforted for the first time in weeks. But she wouldn't allow them to slip over the edges, not with her around- and she certainly didn't deserve to be comforted. She deserved to be killed for what she'd done. Burned alive. Tortured. And certainly not held in comfort by the very person who caused her to become this monster, who deserted her and her people, who caused her very bones to shatter from pain. The warm arms enclosed her, rubbing her back and pulling her closer, causing her body to fill with fury. She reached down and pushed the hands away from her and propelled herself off the ground to a standing position.

It took her a second to steady herself and she felt a stabbing pain radiating from one of her feet. She hissed quietly but was determined to match Lex- the Commander's indifferent expression- but the other girl took notice of the action and quickly stood up and stepped forward. "Clarke-" her voice came out hoarse and choppy, and she cleared her throat before starting again. "Are you alright?"

Her expression remained passive, almost unconcerned, but Clarke knew the girl too well and saw the fear in her eyes. Although she was intent on leaving Lexa- the Commmander- as soon as possible and finding food and a new shelter as soon as possible, she knew she had almost no chance of being able to leave. The Commander's strength was tenfold hers, especially in her weakened state, hungry and vulnerable. And as much as she despised to admit it, she needed help. 

The proximity of the Commander was too close for her liking, and she needed to sit down soon- choosing a log next to her makeshift firepit as the target. Her foot ached in protest as she moved to slowly turn around and make her way to the log, but her eye was drawn to the fire roaring and crackling in the pit. She halted abruptly, choosing instead to sit on the stone floor between her bed area and the fire.

Instead of answering the Commander's question, and momentarily distracted from the pain of her foot, she took the chance to inflict as much emotional damage on the girl in front of her as she could; but she had to get her bearings first. "This was your doing, I assume?"

"Yes, Clarke." She watched as the girl looked at her with what seemed to be a mix of attempted apathy and concern. She watched as the reflection of the fire danced in her eyes.

"I didn't need help, you know. I was fine by myself, so you can leave if you're done here. I'm sure you have other things to attend to- perhaps any more betrayals you have smooth over?"

The girl's eyes flitted downwards, and although her face showed indifference, Clarke knew her all too well and could see the flash of hurt. Good, she thought. She deserves it. "I'm sorry, Clarke. I had no choice. But that's a matter to discuss later, seeing your current state." Clarke quickly glanced down and realized she was still wearing the tattered shirt from last night, and goosebumps were starting to appear on her arms. In an effort to both warm herself and cover up more than just her bindings did, she crossed her arms. She glanced up at Lexa- she had given up on correcting herself in her head, but she vowed to never speak her name, just her title, out loud.

Her cheeks flushed with embarrassment and she saw Lexa shift her eyes downward if only to give some semblance of privacy. As she did so, she reached around- slowly, as not to startle the already apprehensive girl in front of her, and pulled out a change of clothes and some furs. As if to give some idea of a choice, she moved forward, again, slowly, and placed the clothes a foot or two before Clarke before averting her gaze again and backing away. "Clarke, I know how you must feel right now, but you are going to fall ill if you don't warm. Beja, put these on. I'll return in a couple minutes."

Clarke took note of the use of Trigedasleng, using the little amount she remembered to help her remember. Please. As much as Clarke wanted to reject the offer and take the chance to run, she knew if she didn't accept Lexa was right- she was going to fall ill and stand no chance of standing up to Lexa- and most likely end up in a tent at one of the clan's camps for a couple weeks. With a sigh and a soft grunt of pain, she lifted herself from the floor and reached for the clothes. Immediately, she noted the softness and thickness of the material clearly made for winter use.

Taking one last glance around to make sure nobody was watching, she hurriedly pulled off her loose, dirty trousers and slipped on the pants Lexa had provided. She noticed the difference compared to the pants from the Ark; these ones were clearly made for more comfort during movement and had a more skintight, soft feel. She winced as she shifted her weight to her other foot to pull the other leg of the pants on, and knew Lexa would be asking about her foot later. She sighed again as she picked the loose shirt up and pulled it over her head, noticing the goosebumps on her arms fade slowly.

Turning around to pick up the furs, she let out a small yelp of surprise at the figure standing behind the fire, carrying a black pot and 2 bottles made of animal skin, or waterskins, as the grounders called them. She didn't hear her approach, startling her, and she could see her flushing in the light of the fire. "My apologies, Clarke. I assure you I didn't see anything" she reassured.

Clarke felt her cheeks heat up and she ducked her head, slightly shivering at thoughts of scenarios where she had. That might have been a possibility months ago... now, she wasn't even comfortable with the simple touches Lexa had given earlier. "Are you still cold?" Lexa's face contorted into a concerned, almost fearful look, and she immediately started removing her own coat.

Clarke's heart jumped and she rushed to answer before the girl could get any further. "No! Don't worry, I'm fine. Thanks, for the clothes by the way." Noticing the girl still looking at her anxiously, she did her best to give a reassuring smile, but quickly caught herself. No. She hurt your people. Her face quickly changed to her best impassive look, imitating Lexa's earlier expression. She watched the girl mimic her, but her eye portrayed her mind and she could tell she was pained by the action.

The brunette set the pot over the fire, propped up by logs, and handed one of the waterskins to her. Clarke looked at her questioningly, and Lexa sat opposite from her on another log. "Soup and water. You need to eat", she answered her unspoken question.

"No, I'm fine! Can you please just leave now?"

"Clarke, gon gods sak, all you've had for the past week are nuts and berries. You're on the edge of passing out from lack of food, and you're severely dehydrated, not to mention your foot is sliced open- please let me help."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigedaslang translations: 
> 
> beja: please
> 
> gon gods sak: for god's sake
> 
> Authors note: Was that too long/short? Do you guys like it so far? Is there anything I can do to make it better? Would you guys like chapters from Lexa's POV? I really hope you guys enjoyed it and the amount of kudos and comments on the last chapter actually brought me to tears as a first-time writer. I love my readers so much!! I think I might turn this into either a fairly long (40-50 chapter?) book or possibly an entire series based on the responses I'm getting- I'd love to hear your thoughts and suggestions, and please leave votes/kudos/comments!!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Someone in the comments made the suggestion of keeping Anya alive and as a sister to Clarke. I think I'll put her more as a grounder friend- this might just be me, but for some reason, I can never imagine her as from Skaikru. I promise all of your favorite characters will make appearances and stay alive throughout the book. There may be some close calls, but I promise I will never kill off a character important to the plot line/my readers!

Last chapter ending:   
The brunette set the pot over the fire, propped up by logs, and handed one of the waterskins to her. Clarke looked at her questioningly, and Lexa sat opposite from her on another log. "Soup and water. You need to eat", she answered her unspoken question.  
"No, I'm fine! Can you please just leave now?"  
"Clarke, gon gods sak, all you've had for the past week are nuts and berries. You're on the edge of passing out from lack of food, and you're severely dehydrated, not to mention your foot is sliced open- please let me help."

At that, she opened her mouth for a response and had none. Why did this girl even care about her, after leaving her in her most vulnerable, hurting time and forcing her to murder hundreds of innocent people? Was this personal, or political, or both? How did she know what she'd eaten? "How the hell do you know that?"

Lexa paused for a moment as if surprised she let that slip and sighed. "I've had a warrior trailing you from a distance to ensure your safety since you went missing. He's reported back to me about your condition, and I considered it time to step in."

Clarke shook her head and sighed. "Of course you did. If you help me with my foot and see me eat, do you promise to leave? As well as your warrior?"

Lexa looked pained and tightened her lips. "Yes. If that is what you wish, for me to leave, and you are in good enough health, I will leave you with food for a week and return in 3 moons to check on your condition. The warrior will stay put with you. His name is Gustus. You need to eat and drink before you lose your strength.” 

Clarke scoffed but didn’t reply in words. Instead, she accepted the small wooden bowl filled with steaming soup and smelled it. Instantly, it was like a switch went off in her head. She froze up, and her face turned apathetic, but clearly communicated something was wrong. Lexa rushed over to her side and took the bowl from her and set it down, then pulled her into a tight embrace.   
She shook her off, pushing Lexa away with both hands. “Why did you betray me? Why?”

Lexa gulped and answered in an unsteady voice. “Clarke… you know I had to… it was for my people. It’s my obligation as the commander to put my people before everything, and I did. We can talk about this later, but right now we have bigger concerns”.

""We" don't have any concerns at all”, Clarke spat.

“Yes, we do.”

“Do tell,” Clarke smirked and rolled her eyes.

“Your foot possibly? Or the fact that you haven’t eaten anything sustaining in over 2 weeks?”

Clarke put on a mask of indifference, but on the inside, she knew Lexa was probably right. She didn’t show it though. Instead, she summoned all the rage, all the spite inside of her, and let it out in one sentence. “I don’t know why I’m still here, talking to you. I hate you, and I wish I had never met you!”

Lexa tried not to let Clarke see how much those 3 simple words hurt her, but the other girl could see pain flickering in her eyes, darkening and dulling them, and the slight recoil of her arms. “You're angry, Clarke, but I know you. What you've done haunts you, and it's easier to hate me than to hate yourself.”

Clarke was taken aback by the harsh truth spilling from Lexa’s mouth. She sneered. “Oh trust me, I can do both.”

“What would you have done, if their leader had offered you the deal- save your people at the price of mine? Would you really have chosen differently?”

She was startled by the question, and the look on Lexa’s face she had never seen before. It rattled her to her core. “I don’t betray my friends.”

“But you did. You had friends in Mount Weather.”

“Those deaths are on you, too. The only difference is you had no honor and I had no choice.”

“It helps no one to dwell on the past, and that’s not why I’m here. We can talk about this at a later time. I need to see your foot before I leave."

She propped her foot up on her other leg, undoing the cloth bandage. Clearly, overnight, the wound had taken its toll. It was even redder and inflamed than before, and the edges had widened to show fluid seeping from the inside. As Lexa pulled salve and more bandages from her pack, Clarke grimaced, then hissed when she touched the swollen flesh. This was a serious infection, she could tell, and was going to need several days of medical treatment if she wanted to avoid losing her leg and possibly even sepsis- which now that they were on the ground without the advanced technology of the Ark would be impossible to reverse course after the worst set in.

When Lexa sat down next to her and took her first look at the injury, her face flashed with distress. She could tell this was a dire situation, and the limited medical experience she had as Heda definitely wasn't enough to fix this. She tried to remain apathetic to Clarke, but on the inside, she was ripping herself apart. "Com, fisa! Hur op!", Lexa shouted to what seemed to be the empty vastness of trees, but within seconds a small man hustled out of the woods, carrying a wooden basket with various medical supplies. 

Clarke was at first startled, but after processing, she wasn't surprised. Knowing that Lexa knew about her condition and that the warrior must have told her she was limping, naturally, she had a healer with her prepared for the worst. He took one look at the wound and turned to Lexa. "Osir souda ge her kom a stegeda qukiyl. Em will gev seile komotu fisaur trate." 

(We must get her to a village quickly. she will become ill if she does not get medical treatment.)

Lexa paled, then did her best to remain calm, so as not to worry Clarke. "Your wound is progressing in severity quickly. We have to take you to a village or Polis for complete treatment. It's your choice which one, but if you refuse... I'll have to carry you there myself."

Clarke paled at the mere thought, then blushed at the thought of Lexa carrying her. "Are you sure I have to? What if I just used a salve-"

Lexa looked at her, and when she took notice of the blush she looked at her with worry and cut her off. "I thought with your medical experience you would know better." Lexa stepped forward and placed the back of her hand against Clarke's cheek, then against her forehead. "Clarke- you're burning up. You're progressing into sepsis. I'm taking you to TonDC right now." She turned around and started shouting orders at the healer, who hustled around preparing to treat her foot.

Sure enough, Clarke touched her own forehead, not wanting to admit to Lexa why she had blushed, but when she pulled her hand away she knew unless she got medical help immediately, she was going to lose her leg from sepsis. Fever was the first warning sign of a severe infection leading to fatal illness. As much as she wanted to be stubborn and attempt to save herself, she knew Lexa would, in fact, tie her unconscious body to a horse, and bring her to Polis without permission. She figured it would be better to go willfully than to kick and scream the whole way because she knew no matter how much Lexa cared about her, she would knock her out for the journey and leave her with a splitting headache the next day. 

"Fine. But considering I have a fever, how the hell do you think I'm going to sit on a horse for 3 hours?"

She saw Lexa give what she thought was a hidden nod to the healer, but Clarke sensed it- often she had been the recipient of the hidden actions. However, before she could react, a needle was in her neck and her vision was darkening at the edges. 

She woke up to a gentle rocking, like what she imagined being on a boat in the ocean would feel like, and arms wrapped around her, supporting her. The next thing she noticed was the sensation of spiders crawling all over her arms, and the next was feeling woozy and almost falling to her side, were it not for the arms catching her.

When she opened her eyes, the world was swimming before her. She could make out the outline of a horse in front of her and the saddle she was on, and could immediately tell the arms were Lexa's. She could feel Lexa moving up closer to her and start talking in a low tone.

"I'm sorry about that. I felt that was the easiest way to administer medication without pain and to let you ride in peace. I know some of the side effects are unpleasant. Your leg is functional for now, and Nyko, the healer, has applied salve to halt the spread of the infection. If we continue to ride to TonDC at this pace, we will arrive late tonight, and get you started on treatment immediately."

Clarke grimaced and started to move her limbs, immediately regretting it as a wave of nausea and vertigo swept over her and she started to fall to the side. In a split second, Lexa’s reflexes were at work and she was back upright on the saddle, in front of Lexa. Clarke’s heart was pounding and she could practically feel the adrenaline making its course throughout her body, slightly shaking from the close call. She could see why Lexa didn’t put her on her own horse. 

Her eyelids started to feel heavy and she started to struggle to remain in her upright position. It felt like 20-pound weights had been strapped to each of her limbs. Lexa leaned into her back and used her arms to support her even more than she had earlier. “I’m sorry, I usually would call for a break after this much riding, but we really need to get you to TonDC quickly. Lean against me more, I’ll make sure you don’t fall off when you sleep.”

Clarke could barely find the words to respond to her, mumbling something that probably sounded like “Ommkay” and let herself drop off into the dark serenity that is sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow wow wow. You guys never cease to amaze me with all the amazing support from comments and kudos- I was hoping for maybe 10 reads total, and to get more than that many comments seriously made my entire week!! As I said earlier, characters like Anya, Luna, and Lincoln will be making frequent appearances in the book- possibly in different forms than in the show, but still keeping them!! I have a couple specific questions I was hoping you could answer in the comments:  
> Do you guys ship/like the ship Raven and Luna? Would you like me to include it?  
> Lincoln and Octavia are a main ship in the shows, but I know a lot of my fellow queer readers would actually rather see Raven and Octavia or another queer couple. Would you guys rather keep the classic ship or switch it up? Ideas for who Octavia could end up with?  
> How long do you want the Angst between Lexa and Clarke to last? Would you rather they realize their feelings soon, or keep up this angst/flirting combo for a while? Who should make the first move, Lexa or Clarke?  
> I don't have a ton of time to write every day- enough for at least 1,500 words about. Would you guys rather see every other day longer updates or keep it like this?  
> What other "side" characters would you like to see appearances from? Monty? Jasper? Abby?   
> Bellamy, Bellamy, Bellamy. So many things we could do here. We could pretend he doesn't exist and drop him completely, we could have him as either a friendly/slightly protective but in a healthy way or jealous/not good Ex to Clarke, or just a good friend. Let me know what you think about him.  
> Any other important details you would like me to include that I may have missed? Something important to you? Something not in the show that you would love to see as a canon appearance?


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry I didn't update yesterday and have a short/incomplete update today!! I was having severe pain and thought we would go to the ER- but I'm back now and I promise to have an extra-long update for you guys over the weekend. Happy New Years!!

Ending of the last chapter:

Her eyelids started to feel heavy and she started to struggle to remain in her upright position. It felt like 20-pound weights had been strapped to each of her limbs. Lexa leaned into her back and used her arms to support her even more than she had earlier. “I’m sorry, I usually would call for a break after this much riding, but we really need to get you to TonDC quickly. Lean against me more, I’ll make sure you don’t fall off when you sleep.”

Clarke could barely find the words to respond to her, mumbling something that probably sounded like “Ommkay” and let herself drop off into the dark serenity that is sleep.

Lexa awakened her several times throughout the ride to administer various doses of medication to her. Nyko came over to check on her once after Lexa whispered to him, and when he placed his hand on her forehead and touched her cheek, he sighed in relief and placed yet another tough leaf on Clarke's tongue. He and Lexa transverse in Trigedasleng, and Lexa let out a long breath and Clarke could feel the tension release from her shoulders. Clarke's fever had broken with help from the herbs and sedative, and although her foot still needed treatment, she had passed the wost.

In what felt like minutes later, Clarke awoke to a warm hand gently rocking her back and forth. It felt like her eyelids were made of lead, and she struggled to open her eyes. The world was blurry, and when she came to her senses her arms were being bitten by the cold winds of winter, and small white flakes were falling from the sky. A gasp escaped her as she looked around in awe. Several inches of cold, white fluff were coating various surfaces around the group of horses, and various guards and Nyko were walking around, tidying up the baggage and their appearances. 

When she looked back around her, Lexa's hair had a thin layer of powder covered her hair. The snow just made her look even more like a regal queen, and Clarke tried to push away the flood of warmth emanating from her upper thighs. She shivered, and immediately furs were placed on her lap and wrapped around her shoulders, intertwining with Lexa's. When she tried to look directly up at the sky, a small chunk of snow fell off a tree branch and landed directly in her nose, making her sneeze like crazy.

After she finally stopped sneezing, she shifted her glance up and Anya was standing next to the base of the tree with a wicked smirk on her face. As her arm shot up to rock the branch again, Clarke squealed and ducked under the furs against Lexa's chest, sighing appreciatively at the warmth radiating from her. 

Her hands buried themselves in the furs, drawing them tighter around her and the Commander. As her fingers accidentally grazed Lexa's upper chest, her hand recoiled to her own chest and she could feel blood pounding from her chest to her cheeks. Lexa's chest briefly contracted, as if to stifle a laugh, and she could just picture her smirking quietly. 

She let a few moments pass, and sprung up from under the furs, ready to ambush Anya and get her back. As her leg jerked up to swing over the saddle, Lexa's reflexes kicked in again and she grabbed Clarke's thigh- sending jolts of electricity throughout her entire body. Clarke watched in amusement as Lexa's face flushed bright pink and didn't even attempt to hide her smirk. 

"Apparently, the pain medicine worked so well you can't feel your foot anymore," Lexa quipped, "but I'll help you anyway. Stay on the saddle."

Before Clarke knew what was happening, Lexa swooped off the horse in one fluid movement, red shoulder cape billowing out behind her. She must have changed from the casual wear she approached her with to her more formal attire- probably for when they made an appearance in TonDC. 

Lexa stood facing her good leg on the ground and held her hands out just a couple inches from her waist. "Do you trust me?" Even in the night, her forest-green eyes glimmered and her face was still pink- from blushing or the cold air, she didn't know.

Clarke gulped, a knot in her throat forming. She did trust her, deep down. But she wasn't ready to reveal that to Lexa- not yet. "I mean-"

Lexa didn't wait for her to respond."When I say so, I want you to lean into my arms. I'll catch you."

Clarke hesitated, then closed her eyes and started to fall forward for a millisecond. When Lexa's arms caught her waist, she opened her eyes and yelped in surprise. She was hovering off the ground by a couple of feet, and her hands were still clutching the reins so tight her hands were turning pale. "Clarke, in case you haven't noticed, I can't put you down without you letting go," she teased. 

Clarke could feel heat rising in her neck and face. "Oh- um- right. Ok," she stammered, letting go of the reins.

The hands on her waist slowly spun her around and gently lowered her to the ground. Anya whooped in the background, and before she could blink, a snowball was in the air and splattered on Anya's chest. A triumphant grin on Lexa's face was quickly wiped off as another snowball sailed a couple of inches over her shoulder and hit the tree directly behind her. 

Clarke felt laughter bubble from her chest and she did nothing to stop it. Squealing gleefully, she hobbled over to a tree and used her good foot (now in a pair of sturdy, warm boots, she noticed) to create a barrier of snow between 2 trees, and crouched behind it for protection. She winced in pain but powered on. It didn't hurt that bad, and she knew it would heal anyway. "Clarke!! You aren't supposed to be running yet! Are you hur-"

Lexa was cut off by a snowball hitting her square in the cheek. A war cry echoed through the woods and although the guards around them stood at the ready to protect them, she could see the quiet amusement on their faces, seeing the great commander playing in the snow like a child. Clarke knew that Lexa must have sworn them to secrecy about moments like these- she must always keep her stoic leadership in front of her people, her Commander facade, but Clarke had seen the other side of her. Lexa. 

Her thoughts were interrupted by Lexa diving behind the snow barrier as a chunk of snow soared through the air and missed the top of her head by only a couple of inches. Lexa's aim was deadly, and soon snowballs were pelting around Anya at the speed of light. After a whispered battle plan was hashed out, Clarke shaped the snowballs and packed them down while Lexa aimed and threw them at Anya. 

The strategy worked for minutes on end, until Clarke's hands were numb from the cold ice and the snowballs were getting more and more misshapen and falling apart. 

"CEASEFIRE!!" Lexa's commanding voice sent chills down Clarke's spine- and then warmth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aden (natblida) was killed in the TV series and it always makes my heart ache. What do you guys think about him maybe becoming a staple character?   
> Comments and Kudos always appreciated if you enjoyed the chapter and THANK YOU to those who comment frequently- I see you and I love you!! You are my motivation :)


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